How to Help Care for Your Loved One With Diabetes
You don’t mean to be part of the “diabetes police,” of course—you just want to help. But assisting others in taking good care of their health can cause distress in even the most loving relationships.
Policing someone else’s health often causes relationship problems, although love and concern may be at the heart of the matter. It’s a recurring theme in the diabetes community’s websites, blogs, message boards, and support groups. The Behavioral Diabetes Institute (BDI) is a nonprofit organization that works to address the emotional needs of people with diabetes to help them maintain good physical health. It has a fact sheet, “Diabetes Etiquette for People Who DON’T Have Diabetes,” addressing this topic.
William Polonsky, PhD, CDE, chief executive officer of BDI, says the institute gets many e-mails concerning caregiving, from both people with diabetes and others who want to help them. There are a few steps you can take to make sure you’re providing a support system, even when your loved one seems to be ignoring his or her self-care.
Make sure the person really needs help. You might think your loved one with diabetes could use a reminder to check blood glucose, for example, or should think twice about eating a particular food. But you don’t necessarily live with diabetes; he or she does. “Oftentimes, caregivers . . . want to take care and take action when it actually may not be needed,” Polonsky says. “There are way too many caregivers who get upset with their spouses or their teenagers: ‘Johnny won’t check his blood sugar!’ But if his A1C is in a good place, then you’re fine.”
• Action item: Consider, with your loved one’s permission, attending a doctor’s appointment together. Hear from the professional whether or not your loved one is on target with health measures. Maybe you don’t have such a cause for concern.
If help is needed, pitch it correctly. Your person with diabetes might be in a “no big deal” mind-set, even if your concerns are legitimate. That’s a rough spot for both of you. Polonsky suggests that you tread delicately and “extend your love.”
• Action item: Mention that you want to refrain from telling your loved one what to do. State your love, your willingness to be a steady presence and source of support, and your desire to enjoy a life together.
Know when to step back. “The problem is, you’re dealing with a functional adult. There’s really nothing you can do [without his or her consent],” Polonsky says. So even with the best intentions, you might not be able to help. “As a caregiver, you may have to get to the point that all you can do is nothing,” he adds. “It doesn’t mean that [you’ll stop worrying]. You have to just wish them well.”
• Action items: Be ready to be a safety net. Know the signs of severe hypoglycemia in case your loved one is prone to incapacitating lows. Have a plan for treating that situation, including injecting glucagon (a diabetes educator can teach you how) and calling 911.
Ask what you can do to help. You can’t be a mind reader, and you’re probably not a doctor. So ask questions, listen carefully, and try to come up with ideas together. Polonsky suggests using phrases such as “How can we do this as a team so I’m not on your case?”
• Action item: Work together to make healthful changes and to simplify care. People have greater success sticking to a meal or exercise plan when they do it in a group. Make that work for you and your loved one by eating the same healthful food and exercising together.
Comments
Comments are subject to review and will not be posted immediately. If you have an urgent medical question, please consult a health care professional. If you have a question for the staff of Diabetes Forecast, please send it to replyall@diabetes.org.DIABETES COMPLICATION PREVENTION
To Whom It My Concern,
Diabetes Police ?
OR DENIAL of PROFESSIONAl services, Prescriptions, Quality of Life ?
There's a "HUGE" DIFFERENCE..........
Corporate Financial GAIN at the serious "UNNECESSARY" NEGLECT, ABUSE, & DENIAL of COMPLICATION PREVENTION & LOSS of LIVES & or their LOVED ONES........RELATIONSHIPS.
WARNING ???
There was no noification, or "WARNING" to DIABETIC'S effected by DENIAL OF TEST STRIPS, & LIMITATION coverage to VETERANS,(2 strips per WEEK) MEDICAID & Medicare (DISABLED or SENIORS)for 4 strips per DAY or WEEK. Regardless if goofed up or dropped stips, or any other reason strips are not available.
SUPPOSE you feel ill OR enjured yourself, not requiring HOSPITAL CARE or a fever, Infection, or worse a HEART PROBLEM.........?
COMPLICATIONS ?
HEART PROBLEMs are not always as they appear !
Sudden ELEVATED Blood sugars "APPEAR" TO BE HEART ATTACHS.. TOO.
LATE OR FORGOTTEN MEDS....can also "APPEAR" to bring on the same symptoms.
The BENIFETS of ACCESS TO 10 strips a day.....relieves the stress.& rules out ER, & unnecessary ALARM to EVERYONE.
NOTE: TESTING BENIFITS....
6 small BALANCED meal DAILY.. 80 to 120 BLOOD SUGAR IS REQUIRED BEFORE ENJESTING FOOD.
SOMETIME THERE'S a GOOF,(FOUL UP in test equipment, OR a CELEBRATION, HOLIDAY, RARE OCC.......before, during & after EXERCISE.
TESTING AGGRESSIVELY IS NECESSARY....
CRUEL:
Hospitatization, Surgeries...MONITORING aggressively is ESSENTIAL...
Physicians DENING 10 stips a day is "SHAMEFUL" CRUEL & UNUSUAL PUNISHMENT.(TOTALLY UNEXCEPTABLE)
ADMIRABLE:
It is admirable of a DIABETIC PATIENT to WANT to TEST BLOOD SUGAR LEVELS.
It promotes better COMMUNICATIONS, HEALTH & SAFETY, PRODUCTIVITY & ECONOMY.......not FRUSTRATION WITH LIMITATIONS.....
DIET, EXERCISE, MEDICATIONS...?
Instructions by PRIMARY, YET RESTRICTIONS, WHY ?
How do DIABETIC'S (ALL TYPES)
(JUVENILE TYPE I's grow up to be ADULT TYPE I'S)
Type II'S
Already have serious complications started due to the DELAY of the DIAGNOSES.....(IF DIAGNOSED at all)
SYMPTOMS:& TESTING ESSENTIALS reasons....
Weight control Issues, emotions, appointments, tension, blood -pressure changes,diet & exercise monitoring, Holidays, events,Guests coming,
EXTRA CURRICULAR ACTIVITIES.....unplaned events , STRUCTURED DAILY QUALITY OF LIFE the same as any OTHER PERSON, OR (PROFESSIONAL)
This REALLY is not requesting to much from physician to provide a diabetic.....
NOTE:
Cancer patients recive "QUALITY OF LIFE" TREATMENT......& not DENIED
Diabetic's have a HIDDEN ILLNESS & LIFE THREATENING.......at that.
Why are they being denied ?
COMMON SENSE:
300 GLUCOSE Strips are less EXPENSIVE THAN HOSPITAL STAYS, AMBULANCE CALLS, 911 teams dispatched.& help prevent PERMINENT COMPLICATIONS.
The health care system needs to honor & respect DIABETIC PATIENTS (all of them) & STOP TAKING ADVANTAGE.
THINK........about it ? Who's life is it ? Who's Reputation's at stake ? It's a WIN? WIN situation.....with CHOICE OF TEST STRIP COVERAGES & QUANITY........
"PATIENT" ADVOCATE REPRESENTATION.......
We need TRUE REAL PATIENT ADVOCATES "for" DIABETIC's....
Where are they ?
EXPERIENCE:
After 45 PLUS years of DIABETES.....with my own health, husbands, & many others.
Asked to establish a DIABETES SUPPORT GROUP by our local community.
I am appauled at the NEGLECT & ABUSE DIABETIC'S are NOW enduring & recieving......& the people behind it all.
BOARDS & COMMITTE WAKE UP CALL:
BOARD & COMMITTEE MEMBERS NEED A BETTER CLARIFICATION of COMPLICATION
PREVENTION...........envoke new standards for elected officals to
INSURANCE COMPANIES, IPA'S ,ADA, JDRF & OTHER DIABETIC RELATED & ASSOCIATED BOARDS & Committee OFFICALS.
NEW..... whom are ("EXPERIENCED" LONG TERM DIAGNOSED DIABETIC'S", especially who can see the BIG PICTURE)NOT just for THE CORPORATIONS
beifit but EVERYONES FAMILIES & EMPLOYEE'S in our NATION.
There's no excuse for COMPLICATIONs.......
It may be you or your FAMILY MEMBER NEXT to be DIAGNOSED or become
a HEART ATTACK VICTIM......OR unnecessary
BLINDNESS, HEART ATTACKS, Strokes, due to: DIABETES induced VEIN AND ARTERY DISEASE & PROBLEMS DUE TO DENIAL of test EQUIPMENT mannually & ACCESSORIES "PLUS" CBM (CONTINUIOUS Blood Glucose Monitoring)
A DIABETIC MOTHER DESERVES to be with her Family to help her PG daughter without feeling stressed, limited test strips, fear of going into INSULN SHOCK...or COMA from HIGH BLOOD SUGAR LEVELs....& never be able to call out for help.
OR a VETERAN DENIED TEST STRIPS (TYPES/ QUANITIES)
Handicapped & ndifficult to SEE his machine & SUPPLIES, DROPS stips or fumbles them....& ONLY ALLOWED 2 stips per WEEK ????maybe 4 if he is "REAL" LUCKY.
....& GOES BLIND because he can only monitor BLOOD SUGARS LEVELS 2 times a WEEK !
OR forced to live in a RETIREMENT HOME with "LIMITED CARE, SHORT HANDED STAFF......& not allowed to simply live alone or with his spouse or relative, or other choice & SLEEP PEACEFULLY.....& SAFE.
BLAMING OBESITY is not the answer....Medications (metformin)& others maybe. carry BLACK BOXE LABLES.....(WARNINGS)
IMPROVING COMMUNICATIONS is essential.......BOARDS & COMMITTIES.
Who is playing GOD here ? MANIPULATING ? THREATENING LIVES .....?
It's NOT US AS DIABETIC'S.......all we are doing is asking for
QUALITY OF LIFE & to save lives....& asking a little more for RESPECT.
I thank you for your PROMPT responce & consideration in CORRECTING this MATTER.
THANK YOU
SBL
OREGON
DENIAL of DIABETIC GLUCOSE STRIPS (LIFE THREATENING)
11/10/2012
Welcome ALL DIABETIC'S
Where are all of you ?
How can our MEDICAL SOCIETY JUSTIFY DENING MEDICAL STRIPS VS
threatening DIABETIC'S lives? Promoting 911 calls , complications?
COMMON SENSE PREVAILS HERE !
I'd like to know who else is cut back on BLOOD GLUCOSE STRIPS
& what type of insurance you have......
Juveniel DIABETIC'S (insulin dependent) LONG or SHORT term
need to know where their blood sugars are at "ALL" TIMES.....
As well as type II's taking oral Diabetic meds. (fast acting) & well monitored DIABETIC'S for their stability, HEALTH & SAFETY.
This is what "PREVENTS" emergencies, & UNNECESSARY COMPLICATIONS....
I'm interested in comments......DIABETICS are enduring with prescription refills & COLLABORATORS......Pharmacies, INS. COMPANY'S,Physicians........(PRIMARY)DENIALS of refills & limitations.
Thank You
AGAIN
SBL
Medford, OR.
sbl98@live.com
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